Save time, date smart

Online dating to find a discreet lover is just as challenging as finding anyone to date online. The good news is that online dating is probably the most convenient way of dating – especially if you’re looking for a discreet relationship; the bad news is that you actually have to invest some of your time & efforts in trying to find the right person to pursue a relationship with.

Here are some general tips to help keep your sanity while looking for that right person:

• If someone interests you, go ahead and send them an email or message. The internet may be the answer to every daters prayers, but there’s one thing it still lacks – the ability to mind-read. It’s a proven fact that unless you tell your crush you’re into them, they won’t have any idea.

• You’re never obligated to share any information that you don’t feel comfortable sharing. The other person sitting across from the computer screen can’t do anything if you decide not to disclose information. You have all the right to ignore their question, refuse to answer, or tell them to bug off completely – if you deem it fitting.

• There’s no such thing as the “waiting game” when you’re dating online. If you want to be mysterious and play hard-to-get, do yourself a favor and avoid signing up for a dating profile. Online, the waiting game just makes you look like you’re not interested; therefore, giving them ample opportunity to begin talking with other (more readily available) members. Don’t sabotage yourself before you even begin, always respond back in a timely manner – especially if you’re interested in that person.

• Think of your profile picture as the “first impression.” Yes, you want to look nice and attractive but refrain from using photos that are 3 years old. Assuming that you begin an actual relationship with someone you meet online, you’ll most likely end up sending them newer photos of yourself; now when they see a completely different person than what’s pictured in your default- you’ll have some explaining to do.

• There’s no time restrictions for online dating, just make sure you invest your time with people you find worth it. Remember, you never have to continue a conversation if you’re not interested; you always have the ability to block people you don’t like; and sign off as soon as you’re done for the day.

Date when you want and stop with the simple switch of the POWER button.

Read more »

Signs that they're cheating

Regardless of your age, how many relationships you’ve been in, how long those relationships have been, or how long you’ve known the person for – it’s sometimes difficult to read whether or not a person is being faithful. Whether your partner is just opting for extra privacy, or if they’ve lost complete interest in the relationship is difficult to figure out. You can consider these to be the redflags of a possible affair; the more they exhibit the more confirmation you have that they’re most likely over your relationship. 

1. No affection is shared in public places 

There’s nothing that illustrates more clearly, “Hey I’m just not that into you,” then when your partner refuses to show any kind of affection in public. If there’s still affection at home, there’s no reason why it should stop once you’re in front of others. Either they don’t want to be seen with you or they’re scared they might run into someone they’d rather avoid. 

2. Flaking-out on your plans is becoming frequent

You’ve been dating for a while now and you’ve noticed that whenever you make specific plans, somehow something “important” tends to come up. First it’s a work emergency, then something with their friend, then a possible family affair which needs to be tended to – all of which conveniently occur when you make plans. You think it may be a coincidence, we think not. Last minute cancellations are the most suspicious ones, what came up that was so important that they needed to flake 2 minutes before it was time to head out – that’s the question you should be asking yourself.

3. “No” on all your ideas

Before you’re even finished with your sentence, they’re already explaining why it’s a bad idea. This is not only demeaning for you, but it doesn’t leave you much influence in the relationship. The ball is always in their court and they’ll keep it that way, especially if they’ve got more important things (people) in mind. 

4. Ignoring your calls and text messages 

This redflag usually means one of two things. One, they’re too busy to be calling/texting you back. Two, you aren’t an important enough priority to call/text you back in a timely manner – both a negative thing. Regardless of whether or not your partner is busy, they should text/call you back eventually – if this never happens you should take the hint and avoid re-calling/texting. You also have to consider why they’re not able to call/text you back – what exactly are they busy with… another person perhaps? 

5. They refuse to let you leave some belongings at their place

Another redflag that usually means A. they don’t really want any evidence of you around because they’re hiding something B. they don’t want to give you a reason to come over again. If you notice that they rather you bundle everything up and take it back to your place, chances are they’re just not that into you.

Read more »

Cheat with Caution

To some, cheating is just second nature. If the act of cheating is inevitable, the only other option is to avoid getting caught. Try to minimize the stress of getting caught by following these simple steps.

Keep communication untraceable
As difficult as it is, you have to keep the communication between you and your lover discrete. Not only should you keep it untraceable but you should try to keep it un-trackable as well. The concept is simple – you should avoid texting, emailing, calling on your regular lines of communication; if you are going to regularly text/email make sure you have separate lines or addresses for it. Never save your username/passwords in your computer, always manually input- so you don’t accidently forget it on your home devices. By un-trackable we mean you should leave the least amount of evidence as possible. You don’t want your lover to be able to bring up old videos of you both, leave the filming for the Hollywood directors. Don’t ever leave voicemails for your lover, keep the emails and texts to a minimum and always delete everything you receive from them. Keep things as clean as possible, the last thing you want is a psycho mistress who eventually unloads the details of your entire affair.

Only involve yourself with trustworthy lovers
In an affair, the ideal situation would be to have a lover that understands the relationship needs to remain discrete. To be clear from the beginning of the relationship would be best, you wouldn’t want someone to have certain expectations for your relationship – when nothing except for a sexual one. Understand that just because you have an extra lover, doesn’t mean you have to provide for them (as you would your wife/husband). Every affair would be different but you shouldn’t be afraid to iron out the details with your lover beforehand; especially if it’s going to be a continuous affair. Stay away from having an affair with your partner’s friends/coworkers/family/neighbors – you want to avoid all people that have a possible connection with your partner. To have the best of both worlds literally mean that both your partners need to come from two entirely different worlds!

Always have a reason
If you’re out with your lover, if you’re going to be home late, if you decide not to go home – you need to have a good reason. Above having a good reason, you need to have a believable reason for everything. The sooner your reasoning becomes implausible, the sooner your affair will be realized by your partner -so take this tip very seriously!

Read more »